Dispensing Happiness

A good cook is like a sorceress who dispenses happiness.-Elsa Schiapirelli

That's me, the magical good cook.

Borrowing from my friend Dexygus, I've created my own food blog.

Read of my exploits in the kitchen! Salivate over the descriptions of fabulous desserts and savory meals I've concocted!

No, seriously...go ahead. It'll make my day.

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Attack of the Pod People


Three Nut & Wild & Brown Rice Pilaf Stuffed Acorn Squash

(Hee hee. Visitors will think this post was written by Stephanie. They'll never guess that it is, in fact, an impostor!

The blog looks the same. The writing style, as well. There's nothing here that could point to the truth: this is actually being typed by a copy! The real Stephanie has been duplicated, and hidden away...

If they wanted proof, I suppose they could find it. Three clear signs this could not be the work of Stephanie.

1. This dish wasn't something that's just 'thrown together'. It required a couple of hours of prep & cooking & baking time. And as you well know, Stephanie doesn't really cook for herself. She'll slave over a hot stove for just about anyone else, but she can barely be bothered to boil water to make pasta, if it's just for her. So clearly, this dish couldn't have been made by her hand.

2. It's a Squash! If you've spent any time getting to know Stephanie, you'd already know she never eats squash of any kind. No zucchini, acorn, butternut...eggplant makes her run away. So, a recipe for a baked squash would never ever show up on Dispensing Happiness.

3. You're about to hear how good the squash was. Seriously. Stephanie hates squashes, of any kind. So a rave review of an acorn squash, much less a stuffed acorn squash, could never have come from her. It's simply not possible. Only a doppelganger would say such things.

I wonder what other hated foods we can feature while Stephanie's, uh...'sleeping'? A baked fruit dessert? Mushroom soup? Oooh...I know! We can slowly incorporate cilantro into every dish! Brilliant...

What the frak is going on here!? Gross...what is this stuff? No, not the squash; this gooey stuff all over me. Oh, my god...I've been replaced by a pod Stephanie!

YOU! Get your vegetative fingers off my keyboard before I grab the (totally organic) pesticide!

That thing is so going to pay for this...I like the color green, but not being encased in it!

Yeah, sorry about that. One minute I'm sitting down, eating an amazing baked acorn squash (warning: audio), the next thing I know, I'm staring out a Matrix-like people-pod.

We'd purchased an acorn squash to serve as the body of a vegetable-composed, dip-holding, dinosaur for Alex's school Halloween party. As time ran out & things piled up, the dino got the ax. Um...what I mean is, we nixed the idea. No dino-cide here.

I hate to waste food, particularly dairy & produce. I have been, over the past how-many-years, working to try & re-try food I'd disliked or feared. And I really did like the filling, at least, of a baked acorn squash my mom served two Christmases ago...

And yes; I did cook for myself. I don't know why I don't make a habit of it (ok, actually I do...but that's much too long a story & this is already a considerably long-winded post, by my standards). If I can warm something up, or use bits of what's hiding in cupboards, I'm fine. It's twisted, sure. But I'm used to it.

I had a basic idea of what I wanted: I love rice, and the nuttiness & crunch of both wild & brown rices would be ideal. Pecans are fantastic, but walnuts & cashews make things even better.

Some onions, celery, a bit of oregano, salt & pepper...and into two halves of a partially baked acorn squash. Finished off in the oven.

I knew the pilaf would be good; I'd had a small bowl with the squash finished baking. What I hadn't anticipated, though, was how good the acorn would be!

Seriously. I sat there, alone save for the puppies, saying 'I can't believe how good this is!'.

And I ate it all. I really did. I'm stunned.

I don't know if it's something I ate as a child, or misconceptions...what. But I've refused to even try squash.

No, that's not entirely true. I will eat butternut squash, in a soup, or as a pasta filling. But it's the squash in it's whole form I've turned away from.

I keep working on my hang-ups; every so often, I give a 'hated' food another go.

I'm not saying squash will be on our menu every week, but after this experience, it will show up.

What's that? Oh, Wicklow! Drop it! I mean, her! It...? No, bad dog...bad...ewwww. That was just sick & wrong. Well, on the plus side, I don't think I have to worry about that 'thing' coming back.

Maybe it's compost-able???

November brings a bit of the glitz & glamour to Blog Party, as we celebrate The Holiday Edition, 2.0, this month. RSVP no later than Thursday, 20 November...hope to see you there!

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8 Thoughts for food:

At 8:33 PM, Anonymous breadchick said...

Oh yea, love this idea and unlike the "real" Stephanie versus the "pod" Stephanie, I LOVE Acorn Squash! This will also fit in just fine with my Pantry Week.

At 12:34 PM, Blogger Natashya said...

I love squash, but did have to rediscover it for myself. My grandmother had the ability to cook even the colour out of vegetables.

At 3:28 PM, Blogger Lysy said...

SO glad you found a squash recipe you like!

At 9:42 AM, Blogger Maggie said...

Hilarious post! I'm glad you're coming over to the squash side. The combination of rices and nuts sounds fantastic.

I love your site. If you are interested in accepting and/or passing along an award see my post.

At 8:21 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

breadchick...I've been working on conquering my culinary fears. And yes, it's so adaptable to various pantry items!

At 8:23 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

Natashya...I couldn't eat spinach for almost 20 years because my Mom used to serve spinach from a CAN. I gagged on it, I couldn't even smell spinach for a good ten years...

At 8:23 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

lysy...me, too! It was yummy.

At 8:29 PM, Blogger Stephanie said...

Maggie...thanks so much! I appreciate the award!


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